Pregnant women should not be made to feel they are wasting a health professionals time

The 3 days of agony I went through could have potentially been avoided if someone had just listened.

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#misCOURAGE story, 22/05/2017, by Siobhan

I was just about to give up on dating altogether but then I met Michael. It was pretty intense but not so much so that it burned out quickly.

We decided after 4 months that I would come off the contraceptive injection, I should've had one at the beginning of February. Fast forward to June 4th, the day I conceived our first baby.

I knew early on that I was pregnant so when I finally took the test and got those 2 little pink lines I was prepared! I've never seen my wonderful man cry, and he's not the crying type but he did that day.

We were both so damn happy! After a few weeks we told family and friends. Everyone was ecstatic, it was amazing.

Around week 6 I started spotting, I knew some spotting was normal so I wasn't too worried. However, I started to bleed every time we had sex.

I would bleed at work (I'm a dementia carer) when I was doing strenuous tasks. Trying to squeeze and old man's swollen feet into a pair of socks after a hot shower in the middle of summer....I think I sweated out about 6lbs that day.

I called my surgery to book an appointment with my gp, the receptionist told me that I won't be seen until I was 8 weeks, I repeated that I was spotting a fair bit... Still a no go from the delightful receptionist. 

I called regularly up until I lost my baby on August 24th at 11+4. They either had no appointments, refused to give me an emergency appointment or I was spoken to like I was a nuisance.

And I quote "what do you expect a doctor to do about it" after I had called the last time because I was in pain. 

I ended up in the walk-in centre after having the most horrendous cramps, so painful I couldn't breathe properly and I cried uncontrollably.

I knew my baby was gone, that this was definitely not normal. So they did some tests, sent me home with an antibiotic and booked me for a scan on the 25th.

My fiancé had gone to a cricket match with friends so I was home alone when the agony started again.

I had taken paracetamol, tried having a warm shower, heat packs. Nothing worked, I couldn't sit still and I felt a pressure that needed to be released so I was constantly going to the toilet.

As I bent down to pick something off of the living room floor and I felt a hot rush of fluid between my legs, I thought I'd wet myself. I put my hand there and it came away bright red. I was hysterical.

I went to the bathroom, pulled my ruined knickers and leggings off and there he was. I always assumed it was a he.

My fiancé cried for the second time when he got home. He felt totally helpless seeing me lying on the floor with a towel between my legs. 

The hospital were amazing but obviously had no answers for me, which was hard but I understood why. I went back for several scans to make sure what was left was coming away.

I bled for 8 weeks but it took me months to come to terms with our loss. I was petrified it would happen again and I still am. 

We are expecting our rainbow baby in January. My midwife already has my paperwork I'm just waiting for my first appointment.

I am so grateful I am surrounded by the most amazing people, my family, friends and my wonderful man. Oh and my little shit of a cat, Lilly.

Pregnant women should not be made to feel they are wasting a health professionals time.

The treatment or lack of, I had previously was disgusting and shameful. The 3 days of agony I went through could have potentially been avoided if someone had just listened.

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Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer


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