#misCOURAGE stories, 13/01/2017
At the age of 38 my partner of 9 yrs and I decided it was time to start a family. I fell pregnant straight away. We were delighted. We were so excited about our 12 wk scan.
When we arrived we talked about how many scan photos we wanted. I laid down and couldn't take my eyes off the screen, waiting to catch a glimpse of our baby.
Then nothing, there was nothing there. Then the words you dread... I'm sorry. I'd had a missed miscarriage.
We left, both just numb really. We told ourselves this happened for a reason. Three months after having a d&c I fell pregnant again.
This time was different, I felt awful. Sick all day. I was so happy. We had our baby boy in Oct 2011. He was perfect.
A year later we tried again and again fell pregnant almost instantly. I felt great. No sickness, nothing. At the scan I knew before I even looked at the screen I'd had another missed miscarriage.
Again we said something must have been wrong with our little angel.
We left it about 4 months then went for it again. Time was ticking. I was now 40. This time I had a bleed and went for scan to be told again... I'm sorry but you've miscarried. We left in tears.
I got home and kept telling myself I was so lucky to have my beautiful boy but I just became desperate for another baby. I couldn't stop thinking about trying again. It was a terrible strain on my partner.
We decided to try one last time. I miscarried for the fourth time. I was defeated. I concentrated on enjoying my handsome boy and spending quality time with my family.
We had by now decided enough was enough but after a year we talked about giving one last try. At 41 with 4 miscarriages behind me I thought we would have no chance.
I got pregnant within 2 months. Because of what had happened I was given a scan at 8 wks. I stared at the screen knowing this time it was going to be ok.
I felt awful again, terrible morning sickness. I have never been so happy to feel so awful.
At my 20 wk scan we were told I had placenta previa and it was severe. I would definitely need caesarean. I didn't care as long as my baby was safe.
I had a few bad bleeds and spent most of the last 2mths in hospital on bed rest. I had another beautiful baby boy Oct 2014.
I tell myself every day how lucky we are to have our two gorgeous boys.
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