Tommy's PregnancyHub

Dear pregnant me...let's talk about your new identity as a 'Mum'

Things I wish I had known when I was pregnant about...your new identity as a ’Mum’. Do whatever you need to do to get some ’me’ time in the diary, and remember that this new title of ’Mum’ doesn’t define you, it’s a part of who you are.

Ever wanted to go back in time to tell your ‘pregnant self’ a thing or two about being a new parent? In a series of posts, Laura does just that…taking some of the most common things pregnant women and new mothers experience and giving herself (and others) a quick pep talk! However you’re feeling, you’re most definitely not alone, take it from us!

You're a 'Mum' now. In fact, you've been a 'Mum' since the moment you saw that positive result on the pregnancy test. Yes, you are a 'Mum', and your life is now completely, utterly, overwhelmingly, 100% dedicated to this tiny little life that is dependent entirely on you. And your partner, don't forget you still need to dedicate some time to making sure they're okay and happy. Oh, and the house, don't forget to make sure you keep on top of the house work; you aren't working after all so you've got time, surely?

And then there's you...well, there isn't really time for you is there? Let me tell you something, there IS time for you and it is VITAL that you find it and use it. For a while, you're going to feel a bit 'lost' and like you don't know where you fit anymore. Work seems to be ticking along just fine in your absence, your social life is on sabbatical, conversations with others all revolve around how the baby is doing, and after a while people are going to stop visiting you and the baby in such intense numbers - it is going to feel like you've lost your place, but I promise you, you haven't.

Yes, you've got a new role and a new responsibility, but you are still 'You' and you are still worthy of your own time and attention. So be sure to hand the baby over to your partner or a grandparent sometimes whilst you go for a long soak in the tub, a run, or a drink with your girlfriends. Do whatever you need to do to get some 'me' time in the diary, and remember that this new title of 'Mum' doesn't define you, it's a part of who you are.

A little bit about Laura...

Laura lives in Hertfordshire with 17 month old Harry, and when she can, enjoys meeting up with friends for lunch, seeing family, and watching too many episodes of Friends on Comedy Central! She was motivated to write about her experience because…

“As a new mum, with all the raging hormones and uncertainty that involves, it was just nice to hear from people who were going through the same thing from time to time, to reassure myself I wasn't losing the plot completely! So if I can give that same reassurance back to another new mum, that's definitely something I would want to do.”

Laura and her baby.

Read more about managing relationship problems and pregnancy on our website. 

Read more from Laura in our blog.