Our Rainbow

Sam reflects on her experiences of loss and what the term rainbow baby means to her.

Sam’s story

My name is Sam and I am from Manchester, England. I am a wife, angel mother, nurse, cat lover and novice home- baker.

In 2014, my husband Martin and I decided to start trying for a family. By January 2015 we were pregnant and over the moon, but sadly we had a missed miscarriage at 8 weeks.

By June, we were pregnant again, although this time more anxious than excited.  Those first 12 weeks were agonising, but once the 12-week scan came along and we saw that heartbeat and wriggling baby, we began to get excited again. 

At 20 weeks, we found out our little boy was measuring worryingly small for gestation and got referred the Tommy’s Placenta Clinic at St. Mary’s Hospital in Manchester. This clinic works with pregnant women whose babies have are not growing as they should be. 

At 23 weeks, we met the consultant and were given the heart-breaking news that our baby was unlikely to survive, as my placenta was not functioning very well.  Two weeks later, our son Guy died at 25 weeks.  He was delivered naturally 2 days later on Friday 13 November 2015.

 My husband and I spent the night with Guy – just the three of us. The midwives were amazing. They gave us a memory box and helped us to take photos and capture Guy’s footprints

Six months later, we decided it was time to start trying again. I sadly had yet another miscarriage. As this was our third loss, we were referred to a consultant. We had lots of blood tests to try and find the reason why we were losing our babies, but everything came back clear.

I fell pregnant again at the end of 2017. The Tommy’s clinic was amazing and monitored me very closely at the beginning of my pregnancy. I had lots of scans and it was wonderful to see our baby grow each week. It was a very anxious time, and there were so many milestones to get through. It was amazing to feel the baby kick, but I was also terrified as this was unchartered waters for me.

Our rainbow baby Cooper was born at 37 weeks in May 2018. Cooper is a gorgeous blonde haired, blue eyed boy. He’s developing the cheekiest little character and it’s just been amazing to watch him grow.

What does the term 'rainbow baby' mean?

A rainbow baby is a baby born after miscarriage, stillbirth or neonatal death. Rainbows symbolise hope and light after a dark time. The use of this term doesn’t mean that mums and dad regard their previous babies as a ‘storm’. Martin and I do not consider Guy as a storm at all, we love him dearly.

The three years it took to get Cooper were incredibly tough; that time was our ‘storm’. It was an exhausting and all-consuming period of our lives. To have a rainbow baby at the end – our pot of gold – means our life is now full of sunshine. Life is colourful now Cooper is here.

It’s wonderful to see companies creating rainbow themed products, especially if they are supporting Tommy’s. The care I received at the Tommy’s clinic was invaluable and any support for them should be celebrated.

Tommy’s partnership with MAM began in 2018 with the launch of their Rainbow Soother & Clip Set. 50p of every soother sold will go towards Tommy’s vital research to save babies' lives. So far, over £13,000 has been raised.

Follow Sam's journey on her Instagram and blog

Read more baby loss stories

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