The pain of having my worst feeling confirmed was awful

Life is extremely unfair and regardless of how often this happens it's still mentally and physically painful.

Heartbreaking stories. Devastating stories. The miscarriage story needs to change. That's why we've created Tommy's book of #misCOURAGE. Read this story now and help spread the word that miscarriage can no longer be ignored. Help us change the story to save babies' lives.

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October 2016

Lisa

The day before my 12 week scan I discovered the tiniest spot of blood. There was no pain though, just a tiny pink dot but I had a feeling that something was wrong so I called my midwife in panic.

Don't worry she told me, it's normal and you've your 12 week scan tomorrow so there's no need to go to hospital tonight. 

I woke up the next day still feeling unsure. Quite rightly so because the ultrasound didn't show my wriggling 12 week baby and instead on the screen was my baby at 8 weeks with no heartbeat. I

have never cried like it before or since but the pain of having my worst feeling confirmed was awful.

I'd had a missed miscarriage and the worst was that the past 4 weeks I'd been walking around secretly talking to my baby that was no longer with me.

I stayed in hospital that day and had a D&C. I chose not to leave hospital and let things happen naturally because for me it felt like I could let go more easily. I was so wrong and although I have gone on to have 2 very healthy babies since I still wonder everyday what he or she would have been like. 

Life is extremely unfair and regardless of how often this happens it's still mentally and physically painful.

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Disclaimer

Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer

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