My baby is not just 'one of those things'

The statistics for miscarriage are shocking, 1 in 4 women suffer a miscarriage and yet it is barely talked about.

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Heartbreaking stories. Devastating stories. The miscarriage story needs to change. That's why we've created Tommy's book of #misCOURAGE. Read this story now and help spread the word that miscarriage can no longer be ignored. Help us change the story to save babies' lives.


#misCOURAGE 07/09/17 by Louisa

My second baby was miscarried at 5 weeks. I hadn't known I was pregnant very long but it didn't feel right from the start. The lines on the tests were faint and surely enough I started bleeding the next day. I saw my tiny baby.

After various blood tests and being told to do pregnancy tests until they were negative I was told I had had an early miscarriage and it was just 'one of those things'. I was offered no after care, no support, just asked if I was going to try again. It was as though I was expected to brush it off and move on.

But to me my baby was not just 'one of those things' they were my baby and they died and no one could tell me why. They were wanted, they were loved and they mattered so much even though they were only 5 weeks gestation.

The statistics for miscarriage are shocking, 1 in 4 women suffer a miscarriage and yet it is barely talked about.

No one wants to hear about it because it's so awful but refusing to talk about it won't make it go away, it won't stop it happening and it won't change these appalling statistics.

 The work Tommy's are doing for pregnancy and baby loss is amazing. It's so good to know there are people trying to make a difference and save babies lives. Encouraging people to share their experiences is the first step towards change.

 I was fortunate enough to get pregnant with my rainbow baby boy a month after my miscarriage he is 15 weeks old now. He was not intended as a replacement for my baby who died, he is his own amazing little person and he along with his 22 month old brother are the rays of light and a positive focus in my life I am so grateful for them.

 I hope all of these amazing #miscourage stories encourage others to share their stories about their babies. Even if they just help them to know they are not alone and their are other people out there who know how awful it is. You cannot feel grief if you have never loved, your pain speaks wonders of how much you love your baby and what fantastic parents you are.


Go to the full list of stories.


Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer


Please note that these comments are monitored but not answered by Tommy’s. Please call your GP or maternity unit if you have concerns about your health or your baby’s health.

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