It was an early miscarriage, but we'd still busily planned for our new life...

by Sass

As parents we felt devastated and alone in our grief.

Heartbreaking stories. Devastating stories. The miscarriage story needs to change. That's why we've created Tommy's book of #misCOURAGE. Read this story now and help spread the word that miscarriage can no longer be ignored. Help us change the story to save babies' lives.


May 2016

"I'm so sorry, I'm afraid that your baby has died". It was our 12 week scan and the nurse's words echoed around the room. We knew something might be wrong as I'd been spotting blood for a few days beforehand. We'd already had one early scan and saw a healthy foetus with a strong heart beat. I was reassured but still trawled the Internet looking for further reassurance. Some miracle stories, mostly misinformation and some sad endings. 

But now is was confirmed. Our baby had died. It was an early miscarriage, but we'd still busily planned for our new life...a name...clothes. We were enthusiastically nieve. We hadn't told many people about the pregnancy. I'm not sure if that was a blessing or not. As so few knew it was almost like the baby had never existed. 

As parents we felt devastated and alone in our grief.

It was only some months later when I mentioned it to a friend, that she told me that the same thing had happened to her. This reassured me. It helped to have someone to talk to who understood the pain not only of the miscarriage, but also the trauma of the medical intervention afterwards to remove the 'tissue' as the doctors called it. I went on to tell a few more female friends and was stunned to discover that over half had experienced a miscarriage. For some reason it was and is still a taboo subject. I hope that this campaign will help change that so women don't have to go through it alone. 

A year after my miscarriage I went on to give birth to a beautiful healthy little girl. I love her dearly. But I'll also never forget the little heartbeat on the screen belonging to the little one that I never got to meet.

Go to the full list of stories.


Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer


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