I have two beautiful boys and they have three siblings in heaven

I see all women who have held a baby in them, no matter for how long, as mothers.

Heartbreaking stories. Devastating stories. The miscarriage story needs to change. That's why we've created Tommy's book of #misCOURAGE. Read this story now and help spread the word that miscarriage can no longer be ignored. Help us change the story to save babies' lives.

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by Laura Sandon-Webb

May 2016

I first fell pregnant in August 2009. At this time I was so excited, I had done the tests, informed the doctors and was looking forward to sharing our news. However, from about 8 weeks I started to bleed, small amounts but bright red! The doctor coldly told me in a phone consultation that I was probably having a miscarriage and it was ok as I was young and could try again.

After going to A&E, when the bleeding got heavier, I was referred to the EPAC clinic, where they could see a sac around 6 weeks with no heartbeat. We were told to go back two weeks later. We didn't need to! That weekend I passed my baby, it was painful and I felt alone, even though my husband was there with me all along.

Four months later I was pregnant again, but the bleeding had already begun before I knew and again I passed my baby. 

However two months after this I found out I was pregnant again, which resulted in my first little boy.

Scarily I bled this time, but a lovely doctor got me in for early scans and ensured I was monitored all the way through

Four years later we were ready to try again. I fell pregnant quickly and was overjoyed that I had all the symptoms. However I bled heavily one evening. I got in for an early scan which showed a sac, too young to decide if it was viable. The bleeding continued and I passed a large clot. I went back for my second scan broken and in tears from the moment I lay down. The sonographer was wonderful, offered me tissues and even held me before starting my scan.

Then it happened, she turned to me with a huge smile and showed me the screen. There was my little bean, heart pounding! She could also see a dark patch, which turns out was his twin. This was bittersweet but at least one was still there. This little one was born in June 2015. 

I will not have any more babies, I will remember the ones I lost. I talk about my miscarriages to give support to those who are suffering. I see all women who have held a baby in them, no matter for how long, as mothers. We must support each other xxxx

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Disclaimer

Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer

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