I have been pregnant 5 times but I only have 2 children alive one 11 years old and the other 5 months

My story starts when I was 22 finally got pregnant after 2 years of trying.

Heartbreaking stories. Devastating stories. The miscarriage story needs to change. That's why we've created Tommy's book of #misCOURAGE. Read this story now and help spread the word that miscarriage can no longer be ignored. Help us change the story to save babies' lives.

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May 2016

After being diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and being put on meds for the pregnancy seemed to be going well. Then I got to 36 weeks and she stopped moving. I went to the hospital and had two scans confirming she had died. That's the day part of me shut down. Six months later I got pregnant again, I was happy but scared of something going wrong and it did. At 7 weeks I had a very painful miscarriage. I went in myself to hospital and didn't care about anything.

I gave up on wanting children for a while after that. I was hurting too much.

Then about 9 months later I was pregnant again. This time I was so scared but I had extra care and had a healthy baby at 36 weeks. My life was all about her but I didn't want her to be an only child, however I didn't get pregnant again till 5 years later. Then I woke up one day my bed covered in blood and I was rolling in agony. I had had a miscarriage at about 7 weeks. Around this time my sister had just given birth so I kept the miscarriage to myself and my partner.

Three years after later my new partner and I went for tests after trying for three years only to find out he had a problem. So that was the day I gave up and was happy just having 1 child but life is never that easy. Three years after those tests I got pregnant and I had a health baby ay 39 weeks. I was scared throughout the whole pregnancy but I had scans every month which helped me. I wish I could turn back the clock and change the losses but then I realise I probably wouldn't have my 2 wonderful children both happy and content.

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Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer

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