Can I try again?

I'm so scared that I may miscarry again and worry if I could cope.

Heartbreaking stories. Devastating stories. The miscarriage story needs to change. That's why we've created Tommy's book of #misCOURAGE. Read this story now and help spread the word that miscarriage can no longer be ignored. Help us change the story to save babies' lives.


May 2016

My husband and I started planning a family late 2011. I fell pregnant reasonably easily, however at our 12 week scan we found out that our baby had Anencephaly. We were devastated and with advice and support decided to have a termination for medical reasons. Six months later we felt able to try again. Sadly we had a spontaneous miscarriage at 10 weeks. We fell pregnant again very quickly and thankfully we had our son.

When he was two, we decided to try again for a baby brother or sister for our son. Having had a healthy baby we were so positive and excited but at 10 weeks I started to bleed. I had a scan which showed a missed miscarriage but was advised to wait two weeks for a repeat scan in case I had my dates wrong. I was sure that my dates were right and endured an awful two weeks wait where I continued to bleed but did not miscarry.

The second scan confirmed missed miscarriage and I was advised to return for medical management. Unfortunately it didn't work and I had to go theatre. The whole thing was awful, I was so angry and sad, and felt so incapable. Incapable of carrying our baby, yet incapable of miscarrying. I know that sounds mixed up, but I was so confused and overwhelmed. Although losing our first two babies was hard, our third loss hit me the worst. I can't pinpoint why to be honest. 

Afterwards my periods stopped for 8 months and I was diagnosed with cervical scarring following the miscarriage and D&C. I have since had an operation and treatment and I think my body is finally getting back to normal. I also had counseling to help me come to terms with my grief which had helped a lot. 

My husband and I have spoken about planning another baby. I would love to try again but I'm so scared that I may miscarry again and worry if I could cope. 

I'm not sure what we'll do but I couldn't have got through the last year without my husband and my friend's.

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Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer


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