#misCOURAGE story by Harriet ,
Nearly 2 months since the day, My husband and I were beyond excited to be attending our 12 week scan, and see our beautiful baby for the second time. We had scares earlier in the pregnancy and so had an early scan at 6 weeks to check babies heartbeat - to our absolute delight, all was okay. So there we were, in the car on the way to the hospital for our 12 week scan in utter excitement to see how much our baby lemon had grown.
Nothing could have prepared us for what was to come when we were told that our baby had passed away at 9 weeks, and we had suffered a missed miscarriage. We were in the 1% of those who lose a baby at this stage. Whilst the past couple of months have been the toughest of our lives, the love and support we have received from both each other and our family and friends has helped us begin to heal. We have both realised that whilst miscarriage isn’t talked about, and therefore seems like an uncommon event, it is anything but.
I am writing this because I am determined to stop miscarriage being such a taboo subject. It should be talked about. It should be taught. Above all, people shouldn’t be scared to hide their emotions because they think they should be feeling okay, or because they should be strong. My husband and I had hoped that in June 2018 we would be welcoming a beautiful little baby, but it wasn’t to be, and that’s okay. Because, we have each other and one day when the time is right, we will have the baby that we have dreamed of. I can’t express the love I have for My husband.. you’ve supported me and understood my emotions all along, and have never blamed me or anyone else for the things that have happened.
I have learnt the affects miscarriage can have on mental health, and whilst it seems like my emotions will never heal, I know that by talking about my experiences it will get easier. Anxiety isn’t a nice feeling, you feel alone and like you’re not in control. But at the end of the day, it’s a way of coping and dealing with a horrible loss. Spreading the message of miscarriage awareness can only achieve positive outcomes for others xx
Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer
By Kayleigh (not verified) on 30 Nov 2018 - 08:00
We had the same thing happen to us in November 2015, 6 months later we found out we where pregnant again and in January 2017 we welcomed our beautiful baby girl into the world..... if this happens to you do not give up hope!!
By Midwife @Tommys on 3 Dec 2018 - 14:27
Congratulations Kayleigh. So pleased to hear this and thank you for giving hope to all our readers.