All I could say was "I want my baby back inside my belly"

I was at this point upset and confused. I thought my baby was still inside me.

Heartbreaking stories. Devastating stories. The miscarriage story needs to change. That's why we've created Tommy's book of #misCOURAGE. Read this story now and help spread the word that miscarriage can no longer be ignored. Help us change the story to save babies' lives.

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October 2016

So I was walking to the shop one day, and my hips starting hurting and I automatically knew I was pregnant so I took the test.

I was only 19 at the time, but I was so overwhelmed and happy about the situation.

I went to have my 12 week scan, and instead of the nurse being happy to show me what was on the screen, I didn't get to see anything at all. Couldn't even hear a heartbeat.

She told me that I'm not as far along as I thought and she can't find anything on the screen. She told me to come back in a few weeks if I haven't miscarried by then. I left the room really confused and upset. I had no idea what was going on.

A week later, I woke up in the night and needed to pee really bad so I ran downstairs and turned the light on, only to realise behind me was a long trail of blood, and lots of it.

I started crying and panicking while sitting on the toilet, shouted out for help "I'm having a miscarriage!! Help!!" As I just stared down at the blood on the floor in front of me.

I felt something come out of me, I didn't think it was anything serious, so I flushed it all away and got off the toilet while I had an ambulance called for me.

I was at this point upset and confused. I thought my baby was still inside me.

As I laid in the ambulance, they asked me where I miscarried to because they need to collect it, I said it's still in me.

So I got to a&e, where I had a scan only to find there was nothing in there. I then realised I had flushed my baby away. When I got home, I cried for days and all I could say was "I want my baby back inside my belly".

I was heartbroken.

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Disclaimer

Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer

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