#misCOURAGE story, 24/02/2017, by Charlotte
This journey started in 2005 we had just bought our first home and were getting married in the summer and had planned to start a family as soon as we got married. I was 27 and my hubby was 28.
In the June of 2005 we found out we were going to have a baby we couldn't have been happier this wasn't to be and the week before our wedding we lost our baby at just 9 weeks.
We were told that this was very common.
We were both devastated, and we thought it wasn't meant to be. We got married and went away on our honeymoon thinking we've done it once we will he able to do this again.
We did get pregnant again in January 2006, but this again ended in us loosing our second baby at 11weeks. Yet again we were heartbroken.
It took us a long time to get over loosing another baby but we had each other and had to be strong.
We then went on for years trying for a baby well another 11 years and we finally decided to give up it was never going to happen. My hubby turned 40 and we thought that would be it.
But in December 2016 we found out I was pregnant for the third time. It was a such a shock, we had tried for such a long time!! We should have been over the moon, I was scared, no petrified.
I just had such bad feelings and knew I couldn't be happy just in case it happened again.
We went to the early pregnancy unit at the local hospital and they did a scan we could see the sac and the docs said that everything looked good and to try not to worry!!
Easier said than done I spent all the time running to the loo just to make sure.
A few days after that I started to bleed again I was going to loose another baby. I've never cried so much, Life can be so cruel. We went back to the hospital and they did another scan but unfortunately there was nothing there.
I felt sad, empty and lonely. The doctors are now referring us to see about recurrent miscarriage. But age is not on my side so I feel my journey maybe over.
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