After my miscarriage I was handed leaflets, but offered no counselling

I'd often heard of friends or friends of friends having a miscarriage but never ever thought it would happen to me...

Heartbreaking stories. Devastating stories. The miscarriage story needs to change. That's why we've created Tommy's book of #misCOURAGE. Read this story now and help spread the word that miscarriage can no longer be ignored. Help us change the story to save babies' lives.

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Tracey and her partner

by Tracey Cutting

May 2016

I already had five healthy children, but when a close friend gave birth to a baby girl in 2007, it made me very broody. That October I suspected I was pregnant when we got the BFP ( big fat positive ) Ray and I were so excited that we told the children and our families.

A few weeks went by when I started spotting. I rested as much as I could but when I started having pain and cramps I booked in for a early scan. I wanted an internal scan as I was only about 7 weeks but the hospital said that the bleeding was nothing to do with the baby and that you could see baby's heartbeat beating away.

Two weeks later I felt very tired and had a bit of backache, I suddenly felt a lot of blood come out of me. I rushed to the bathroom and saw I was bleeding very heavily, I was scared. Our local hospital was 13 miles away so we went straight there.

What happened next will live with me for the rest of my life; I was at the A & E reception and the pain was unbearable, I was trying to call for help but my words wouldn't come out. The baby came away there and then down my trouser leg I couldn't do anything. The blood was pouring out and I dropped to the floor as my legs gave way.

The next thing I remember was being in was in a wheelchair. I'd lost the baby in the entrance of A&E.

I was mortified and people were staring

Poor Ray didn't know what to do he felt helpless - but the nurses were fantastic, they couldn't have done enough.

I had to spend the night in hospital as I was loosing a lot of blood and had to be scanned the next day to make sure everything had come away.

I was 9 weeks pregnant and had a complete miscarriage. I felt empty, heartbroken,emotional and mentally drained, it was one of the worst things I had ever been through and all I could think was WHY????????????

A nurse came and told me that 'Baby Cutting' would be put into a labelled white box and sent to the crematorium  at the end of the day and discretely cremated with other babies.

I was given some leaflets but that was it ..no offer of help or support or even counselling And to this day almost 9 years on....I still question WHY??????

This is the first time I have really spoken about what happened that day but I know the anniversary 4th November 2007 is stamped in my brain and I will never ever forget the part of me that passed with the angels along with baby Charlie-Ray - RIP my prince.

 

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Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommy’s Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommy’s and are not advice from Tommy's. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. We strongly advise readers not to take drugs that are not prescribed by your qualified healthcare provider. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. Read full disclaimer

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