3 little angels

Story of #miscourage by Laura, 

Hi I'm Laura,

I've had 3 miscarriages. I have never told my story like this before so here it goes...

My 1st miscarriage was 6 years ago. I have a 10 year old son so when I got pregnant miscarriage never entered my head at around 5 weeks I started spotting the next day I had an appointment with my doctor she explained that this was normal to go home and not to worry so that's what I did.

A few weeks later I went for my scan to be told there was nothing there. I was so shocked they looked at me as if I was stupid I went home and cried.

A few days later they rang me to tell me very rudely that I wasn't pregnant. Yet a few weeks later I started to get my usual pregnancy symptoms so I did a test and it was positive. I was a wreck. I went back to my doctor and waited patiently for my scan appointment. 

It got to 10 weeks. 11,12,13 weeks and still no appointment. Then at 14 weeks while out shopping I felt like I was bleeding so ran to check and my heart sank there it was the 1st sign that I was losing my baby.

Not knowing what to do I went straight to the maternity at my hospital they told me to go home and phone my doctor. So the next day I had an appointment she told me the same thing and rang the hospital but couldn't get me an appointment until 4 days later so I went home got into bed.

Two days later I had bad cramps and a feeling I had to push so I went to the toilet. Never in my life did I expect what happened next I pushed and out came this tiny little baby the size off my palm lying in the toilet I was in pure shock I was all alone I didn't know what to do.

I was shaken so I fished it out and rang my doctor she then got the hospital to phone me they wouldn't see me until my appointment two days later they told me to put the baby in a tub and put it in the fridge so for 2 days I sat with my dead baby in the fridge (I still can't believe it happened) so off to my appointment with this baby in my bag surrounded by pregnant woman.

I walked into the room and the nurse give me the biggest hug ever and the took the baby away.

Then a few weeks later I picked it up from the morgue. I have never found out what it was or what happened.

Then in July 17 I had another miscarriage.

Determined that something like that would never happen again I didn't leave the hospital until I was seen. I just feel the way I was treated was unacceptable and now I'm a complete mess and I really don't know where to turn.

I'm devastated to lose another baby. There is not enough support for victims of miscarriage. I was told I shouldn't even have been seen by the midwife who was dealing with me. She was so rude that I just wanted to scream.. if I had of had my scan on my 2nd miscarriage they might have seen there was no heartbeat and I would never have went through the trauma that I did.

Thank you for reading my story I'm sending baby dust to everyone wishing for their rainbow baby good things come to those who wait xo