Casey Jacob Cliffe

In June 2004 we lost our first child, a beautiful baby boy, born too soon at 20 weeks.

Memorial candle.

by Katrina Cliffe

Up until a week before Casey was born I'd had the perfect pregnancy, so it was a complete shock to find out that I have an incompetent cervix at 19 weeks.

We were told that the only chance of him surviving was for me to have an emergency stitch placed in my cervix, unfortunately this carried risks itself and my waters broke during the operation. I managed to hold on to Casey for a few more days until I had to be induced due to infection setting in.

I gave birth to Casey on the 3rd June 2004 at 4.10pm, weighing just 11 ounces and measuring 25cm.

He was absolutely perfect in every way and his daddy and I were absolutely devastated that something like this had happened to us.

After losing Casey we also discovered that I also have a blood clotting condition called Factor V Leiden and that any future pregnancies would involve having to self inject to prevent blood clots forming within the placenta on a daily basis.

We then fell pregnant again five months after Casey was born and unfortunately we suffered a missed miscarriage.

We have since gone on to have a beautiful little girl named Stevie who was born seven weeks premature, weighing 4lb 12oz, but we wouldn't have got that far if it wasn't for the stitch that was put in early on during my pregnancy and the 4 weeks of bedrest before her birth. My waters just went at exactly 33 weeks and somehow my body just doesn't go into labour so I was therefore induced.

In November 2010 - We found out that we are expecting again, I was booked in to have my stitch put in on the 23rd December. Since having Casey and Stevie things have changed so much, I had to have twice weekly progesterone injections (after a Tommy's trial found that progesterone helps prevent premature birth in some women) self inject clexane and take low dose asprin. All of which have left me feeling rather shocking. At 24 weeks a scan found that my cervix was funnelling and I was placed on bedrest. The baby is growing well so that is all that matters at this stage.

At 25 weeks I find out that my consultant whom I nominated for a Tommy's Hero Award has won in the England category - but I can't attend as I'm on bedrest. Absolutely gutted - but the health of my baby comes first.

The bedrest dragged on for 10 weeks, thankfully my consultant allowed me to do at home but this was only because of our previous dealings and she knew that I would do it. Bedrest sounds bliss but after a day it's a nightmare. I manage to get to 34 weeks, past the stage where Stevie was born, and the bedrest restrictions are lifted. I was absolutely massive and struggled with the weight.

The progesterone injections are stopped at 34 weeks, I am so relieved, they are not nice to have, but I have to continue the clexane for the time being. I start walking Stevie to school as the weeks progress to help bring on labour. After all that time willing my baby to stay in I now can't wait for her to come out.

As the weeks progress I start to get really bad water retention and carpal tunnel in both arms. At 39+2 they decide to induce me. I won't go into all the details, but it started on the Saturday and it was Thursday before she was born.

The day of her birth was quite traumatic, I was tired, everyone was getting worried and I eventually ended up in theatre in case I needed an emergency c-section. Eventually our second daughter, Jaime was born (the day before her due date) with the help of forceps. She suffered a cut to her face and I suffered a general tear along with a further tear to my cervix, both of which had to be stitched. Jaime weighed 8lb 13oz at birth, so I'm not too sure I'm cut out for delivering big babies.

My baby carrying days are most definitely over, but I am so grateful for all the professionals that helped ensure I got my daughters here safely and to Tommy's for the research needed to assist the professionals. Without them I wouldn't have my family.

I have been aware of Tommy's since losing Casey and in these last few years they have achieved so much in terms of research and helping to prevent other parents suffering the same fate we have, even the tiniest donation helps, so please spare whatever you can.

Even the tiniest donation helps - just £8 goes towards 20 woman having the cervical stitch!

I would like to make a
donation of

£

Comments

  • By Kathryn Kaye (not verified) on 25 Dec 2017 - 21:42

    Another Christmas without you. You are still in our thoughts, not just today but everyday. I cannot believe where the time has gone. You have a wonderful family who miss you so much and love you endlessly. Forever in people's thoughts. Wishing you were here. Thank you for watching over us all. Big hugs and kisses, although you wouldn't want all the slush being a teen-ager. Love always our darling little angel. Gran and Grandad Kaye. Xxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Anonymous (not verified) on 3 Jun 2017 - 18:14

    Dear Casey, thinking of you and what would now have been the teenage years. Where does the time go. You are thought about often, especially when I look at the bottom of my garden and see Bill and Ben , they were meant for your grave 12 years ago, but instead have sat as a reminder of you everyday. You are missed dearly and loved. Sending you all our love, hugs and kisses in your teenage years. Gran and Grandad Kaye xxxxxxxxxxxxx 13 kisses.

  • By Anonymous (not verified) on 4 Jun 2016 - 11:01

    Wow 12 already where has the time gone. Happy birthday Casey lots of love xxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Anonymous (not verified) on 4 Jun 2016 - 10:56

    Wow 12 already Casey where does the time go. Happy birthday lots and lots of love xxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:18

    My thoughts are with you, a very touching and sad story, I also was a premature baby 9 weeks early, so thanks to the Tommy campain we can help others! kindest regards Claire xx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:17

    A little donation from Great Grandma Cliffe xxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:17

    To remember Casey who is thought about often but not always talked about, but never forgotton. Remebering him with love. Gran Kaye

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:16

    Katrina, this is for Casey Jacob, lots of love from Layla xxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:16

    To my gorgeous little nephew who i never got to know but still love and miss everyday!! Hopefully we can prevent this happening to other families. Lots of love Auntie Sherena xxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:15

    Remembering our special little star, Casey Jacob, You are remembered with love at this special time of year. Merry Christmas our little angel 'Casey'. Loving you always, Gran & Grandad Kaye xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:15

    Casey, Just a little extra something for Christmas. We hope you liked your presents. We miss you more and more every day and Christmas makes it even more painful. Love you always!! Mummy, Daddy & Stevie xxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:15

    This donation is made on behalf of my grandma, She put a little money box outside her door and asked for donations from her friends who visited her to be put towards a childrens charity. She sadly passed away last year. She knew of Casey through Lee and Stacey so I would like to pass on the money she raised to the Tommy's charity. Thankyou.

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:14

    Hey Katrina, never will forget hearing your sad news. How could you have known. Life is so precious and fragile. Thoughts from us all x x x

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:13

    Kathryn Kaye
    Casey Jacob- Our Angel In Heaven. 4 years ago you were sadley taken from us-a moment that we will never forget. We never had the chance to play with you, take you on day trips or buy you special gifts and I often think of you when I see toys that I know you would love. 4 years on and you are still deeply missed. I hope that by donating this money it will stop other parents, aunties, uncles, brothers, sisters, grandparents, cousins and friends missing the opportunties that we have with you, Casey. You are always in our hearts and we will never forget you. Love you always Aunty Stacey, Uncle Lee and Cousin Ashton xxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:13

    Remembering our Grandson Casey Jacob on his Birthday. Gone but not forgotton. Thinking of you often. Love always, Gran & Grandad Kaye xxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:13

    Casey, Happy 4th Birthday, Lots of love and miss you loads, Daddy, Mummy & Stevie xxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:12

    Made a donation

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:12

    Casey, Well it's Christmas again and doesn't time just fly by, we are putting the Christmas tree up at home this week with your little sister so when we have done we'll come straight down and decorate your grave. Hope your looking after yourself and we miss you like crazy, you will always be in our thoughts and we love you so much. Merry Christmas my little angel. Lots of love from Daddy, Mummy and Stevie. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:11

    Christmas again! time has gone but you have never been forgotton. We will never forget you. I cannot express my words, only that you are missed so much by everyone, you touched so many hearts and left an everlasting memory. God Bless you Casey and Merry Xmas, Hugs and loads of kisses. Gran and Grandad Kaye xxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:11

    Hi Casey, 2009 is fast approaching and you'll only then have 6 months left until you are 5, wow. Hope you had a good Christmas and I'll speak to you at New Year. Lots of love Daddy. p.s Stevie say hi big brother. x x x x x

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:11

    Hi Casey, hope you are well, just to let you know you have another cousin, Auntie Stacey has had a little boy, he's called Charlie. Stevie is really excited but she was hoping it was a girl so she could dress him up like a doll. I don't think that'll stop her anyway, do you?. Mummy is ok and so is Stevie. Great Grandma Cliffe say's hello. Miss you loads, Daddy xx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:10

    Just a little something from Great Grandma Cliffe xxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:10

    Thinking of you on your 5th Birthday Casey. Always in my thoughts love Grandad John xxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:09

    Dear Casey, Wishing you were here to celebrate your 5th Birthday and wondering if you would be as chatty and lively as your little sister, just think that you would now be at school, oh how time flies but you are never forgotten and never will be. Wishing things had been so different, but now we all have an angel looking over us. With all our love now and forever. Happy Birthday Casey. Love, Kisses and lots of cuddles Gran & Grandad xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:09

    Hello my special nephew! Thinking of you on your 5th birthday!!! My, what a big boy!!! Wishing that you were here so i could spoil you on your birthday and give you lots of birthday kisses and cuddles. Thinking of you everyday , you are always in my thoughts. I always think of the fun things that we could have been up to, and wondering if you would have been as mischievous as your little sister. Miss you loads Casey!! Lots of love and kisses, love Auntie Sherena. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:09

    Happy Birthday big bro, missing you loads and I love you so much. Lots of love Stevie xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:08

    Happy bithday Casey. Missed everyday and always in our thoughts. Big hugs and kisses to our angel. Love Aunty Stacey, Uncle Lee, Ashton and Charlie xxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:07

    Thinking of you at this special time of year Casey always in my thoughts lots of love. xxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:07

    To my special little nephew!! Christmas time has come again and you have not been forgotten. Thinking about you at Christmas and thinking about how excited you would be waiting for Santa Claus to come down your chimney and leave you lots of presents. Hope Santa leaves you some nice things in heaven with the other litle angels. Love you lots and miss you everyday. All my love, Auntie Sherena xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:07

    Hi Mate, Long time since we spoke so I hope you are looking after yourself. You probably already know this but we have moved house, don't worry not too far away from you. Stevie loves it, she now has her own magical walk-in wardrobe. She still talks about you and as quick as she is growing the quicker the questions keep coming. We all love you loads and we'll come and see you soon. Lots of love Daddy x

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:06

    Hi Casey, happy 6th birthday. Sadly missed and always in my thoughts. Lots of love, hugs and kisses xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:06

    Happy Birthday Casey J!!! Wow, you would have been 6 today, how big would you be now??!!! Think about you everyday and all the things we could be doing!!! Thank you for helping me out when i ask you for special little favors, you always manage to sort them out for me!! Enjoy your birthday with all the little angels, wish i could give you a big hug and sing to you!!! Love you baby boy!! Auntie Sherena xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:06

    Hi Casey It’s that special time of the year again; hope you have a wonderful time with all the other little angels in heaven. Happy Christmas always in my thoughts Love and Kisses Granddad John xxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:06

    To Casey Jacob Thinking about you each and everyday and especially christmas day. I hope you and all your 'girl' angels are having a nice christmas party all together!! Wish you were here to celebrate Christmas day with you little sisters and me. Happy Christmas baby!! Love you Lots and lots and sending you lots ok kisses up to you!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:06

    Hi Casey I hope you are well and that you know we think of you everyday. Stevie talks about you a lot and asks a lot of questions about you. I can imagine the pair of you being two lively, micheavous monkeys if you were here with us and to be honest I think she makes up enough for the both of you. As you know we're having another little addition to our special family - another little sister for you and Stevie. All is going well and I know that you are watching over us and keeping us safe. Love you always little man. Mummy, Daddy & Stevie xxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:05

    Hi its your great gran , All though i dont send messages it does nt mean i have forgotten you .Your thought off very often and wonder if your being looked after by that guardian angel. happy birthday love and big hugs your often in my dreams .love always Great Gran and Great GRANDAD XXX

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:05

    Happy Birthday Casey, Another year has gone by and you are not forgotten, especially on your special day. Wherever you are i hope that you are happy and being looked after. Words cannot express how we feel or anyone else feels at your loss and we all deal with it in different ways, this doesn't mean we don't think about you, we do. With all our love, Gran & Grandad Kaye

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:04

    Happy 7th Birthday Casey, how the years fly by. Hope you have a great day in heaven with all your angel friends. Always in my thoughts. Lots and lots of love. Grandad John xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:03

    HAPPY 7th BIRTHDAY my darling little nephew. The sun is shining brightly today and i know that, that is because you and all the other angels are having fun and those candles on your cake are making our day shine brightly. Wish you were here so we would be able to share a happy day with you and give you lots of love and kisses. I think about you everyday and often wonder what you would now have been like, you'd be a great big brother to your little sisters. I also want to thank you for the luck you gave me today, i know it was you looking down upon me and granting my wishes!!! Sleep tight angel. Lots of love, Auntie Sherena xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:03

    hi casey, Hope your being looked after ok .Still thinking about you and what you would be doing if you were here with us all . Im sure your younger sister would be bossing you around as she does me and i am old .But she is beautiful and we love her dearly as we do you .It wont be long until your other sister is here then she will probably be bossing me around as well.lots of love to you now and always .always in my heart .xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx GG

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 12:00

    Hello my little man , Well your baby sister is beautiful ,it must run in the family.As the three of you .Its warm here at the moment which makes us all very tired.Your mum and dad seem to be coping well after them going through another stressfull time . Our thoughts are with you especially at a time like this .hope your being looked after .A big hug and big kisses you can wipe them off like most children do at your age .Bye for now love always. GGXXXXXXXXX

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 11:59

    Merry Christmas our beautiful angel. We hope our donation helps others to have safe and successful pregnancies. You are thought about everyday and even more so at times like this when you should be getting ready for Christmas day with your 2 sisters. Love you forever Casey. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 11:58

    Hi Casey, Christmas time again and thinking of you at this special time of the year. Stevie and Jaime are very excited about Father Christmas coming tonight. Hope you and your angel friends have a lovely Christmas in Heaven. Lots of love Grandad John xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 11:58

    I can't believe it is coming up to 8 years since we briefly had and lost you. The pain never really goes away, I think of you every single day. Even with your sisters now here, you will always be missing from our lives, but I am eternally grateful that you were briefly part of it. I just miss you so much and I know people might not think that at times but I do my best to make the most out of the life that I now have for your sisters. They need to see Mummy happy and I know that you are the only person to truly understand that. I find it really hard to visit you sometimes as it takes me right back to the week we lost you, we didn't just have a day of losing you, but the days leading up to and preparing for it, and it's just like a broken record, no one else feels that pain on repeat and they just don't understand that I do and it's not so easy as just getting over it. Every time I see you it takes me a good few days just to pick myself back up again. I don't just grieve for a life lost, I grieve for a life that should have been and the memories that should have been created. I know I don't have to asnwer to anyone else as you 'know' all this. There is so much more I can say but that is best kept between you and I. I love you so much baby and I always will xxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 11:57

    Happy birthday Casey, how the years fly by, but you are always remembered lots and lots of love Grandad John xxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 11:57

    Hi there Casey!! Well i just wanted to pop on to say hello and happy birthday and hope that the angels pulled you off a lovely birthday party. As always i was thinking about you yesterday and wishing that you could be with us. We had a lovely day celebrating your little sisters christening and it was lovely to be able to be close to you as it felt as though you were with us. I always wonder what you would have been like now. Love you lots as always. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Lots of love Auntie Sherena

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 11:57

    Hi mate - long time since i was on here, but that doesnt mean i dont think about you less!. in fact as you grow older i think about you more and what we would have been doing on a saturday morning or a Friday night, like on the playstation, shooting up monsters and gremlins :-) Its babyloss week this week and i know i don't normally speak about things or whats on my mind, so just to let you know this week i'll be thinking about you even more than normal.... ps - your sisters say a big hello and send you all their love and i know mummy does this everyday....love you son xx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 11:56

    Hi Casey, Merry Christmas. I know your two cousins would love to be playing and sharing their boy toys with you!! Missing you always. Merry christmas little angel. Love from Auntie Stacey, Uncle Lee, Ashton and Charlie x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 11:56

    Happy Christmas Casey hope you are having fun with your angel friends in heaven today. Lots and lots of love Granddad john xxxxxxxxx

  • By Tommy's on 2 Jun 2016 - 11:56

    Casey, Another year gone!, time flies but you are always remembered and not forgotten. Wishing you a Very Happy Birthday. Thinking of you on this special day. Lots of love and hugs. Gran & Grandad Kaye xxxxxxxxxxxxx

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