All I felt was panic, being back in that room again

October 2016

Jean

I was 37 when I fell pregnant for the first time, I thought it was never going to happen for me.

I remember the excitement of going for my 12 week scan with my husband. We were in the room waiting to see the image of our baby on the screen, but that never happened. We had lost our baby at about 6 weeks they said.

I had what they called a missed miscarriage, I was still carrying our baby.

I was taken in for a D & C.

We started trying again and a few months later I was pregnant again. We were referred to the Early Pregnancy unit and I had a scan at 8 weeks, and everything was fine. But at my 10 week scan I had lost this baby as well.

It was the same routine, back in for a D & C.

We waited a few months to let my body and our heads heal, we didn't rush to try again.

Then when I was 39 I fell pregnant again, I worried that this was going to go the same way so we decided that however it went, this would be my last pregnancy.

Once again we were referred to the Early Pregnancy unit and they said everything looked good, it was a viable pregnancy. My appointment came for my 12 week scan and all I felt was panic, being back in that room again. All I wanted to do was run.

Lying on the bed, they turned the monitor to us and there was our baby.

From then on I had a fairly easy pregnancy but counted all the kicks as I was determined nothing was happening to this baby.

In July 2009 I gave birth to our beautiful baby girl Ava, our rainbow baby.