8 mile barefoot walk in memory of baby Tommy

Daniel and Jade’s son Tommy was stillborn at the end of January 2020. In this blog Daniel talks about what happened and coping with grief in lockdown.

I did an 8 mile bare foot walk fundraiser for Tommy's on 23 January, a year to the day our baby boy Tommy was born sleeping.

On the 23 January 2020 my partner was already an inpatient at Bradford Royal Infirmary. She was 35 weeks pregnant when a scan showed our baby boy had low waters, we were told he needed to be delivered. About an hour later Jade had horrific pain in her belly and back. At this point the heart monitor showed Tommy still had a heartbeat. Jade was eventually transferred to the labour ward and had another scan which confirmed the worst news we have ever heard, our baby no longer had a heartbeat. 

This was at roughly 5.30pm.

Jade began to bleed and was rushed for an emergency section. 

At 10.29pm on 23 January 2020 our baby boy was brought into the world. Born sleeping. The most perfect little baby and a double of his 4 year old big brother, Riley. Jade's kidneys failed and she flat lined on the theatre table multiple times. Thankfully she is now absolutely fine health wise. And we have been told to wait 12-18 months if we want to try again. 

It was caused by a placental abruption.

I was in a really bad state, there was nothing I could do. I was really struggling with the lockdown too. Losing my soon really messed me up.

If it weren't for Tommy's, we probably wouldn't be here. The comfort and support they offered was invaluable to both of us.

I thought, rather than spend his year anniversary in doom and gloom, I would do something good for him. So people remember him. And to speak out that this sort of thing does happen and people should feel they can talk about it. 

My friends and family have been really generous and so far we have raised over £2,000 for Tommy's.